#4 - MindBites - Debunking Fitness: Stories, Goals & Power of Community

:: 00:00

Welcome to Inside of Mine. I'm Tom. Well, I'm Joe, and this is the Inside of Mine Chat Show. A quick disclaimer Joe and I are not professionals in the topics we discuss. We talk from a subjective point of view, from our beliefs and experiences we've gone through in life. Secondly, we absolutely love doing these videos. So, whether it's a podcast or this chat show, please like, subscribe or even share this episode with your mum. It helps us out massively. Now sit back, relax, and this is where we debunk fitness. Joe, pleasure, Pleasure to see you.

I want to start this off with you. Obviously, fitness is, I'd say, in your eyes, your bread and butter. So what is your general routine at the moment when it comes to fitness in terms of rugby, gym and what's going on around you?

:: 00:47

Yeah, we put a poll out to our audience, didn't we? We had a few people asking about our routine so we thought we'd chuck it in there as well, because there's some interest around it. I think my personal routine, as it were my favorite word is probably four to five days a week in the gym, and that's usually weight-based and obviously teaching Pilates as well. So I do a Monday through to Friday. Friday is a lighter day because of games on Saturday Rugby training Tuesday, thursday evening, obviously match day Saturday, and I'm doing gym about four to five days in between, depending on how the body's feeling Do you ever do?

:: 01:27

the Pilates Do I want to say Do you ever do the Pilates when you're in the gym?

:: 01:31

Yeah, it's a good question. So I try and do like, if my hamstring's really tight, for example, I'll do the hamstring section in the class itself and then I'll teach a lot. I'll focus more on what the clients are doing in the class in Bimini. So you can teach quite selfishly, and my boss actually encourages that. So they're like well, if you've got a tight lower back and stretch your lower back, you can be selfish with it. You can teach a bit more on that side of things. And they're kind of like you're too if you're tight in certain areas. But I try and do as much as possible because I did a lot more prior to teaching it. So when you're teaching in the class you've got to be focusing on what everyone else is doing. So, yeah, what about yourself?

:: 02:10

For me, so I have a bit of a random schedule. This is just something that works for me. It might not work for everyone listening, but I do. I'm not enjoying gymming at the moment, but I need to gym just for my mental state and also so I don't get injured in sport.

:: 02:25

Interesting.

:: 02:26

I really struggle in gymming at the moment. I go through phases of loving it and hating it, but I think just having the discipline to do it when you hate it is just the most important thing. So for me I do Monday 6 AM at March, on Tuesday 6 AM at March, on. Obviously you'd have to do it that early. I just do it then and then I'm up and I come back, have my breakfast. I can relax and then start working. But I just get those two sessions done at the start of the week. So it's like it's done.

I can relax now for the week. I know I've done my lower body and my upper body and that gives me a bit of peace of mind. Tuesday evening I then have rugby training. Wednesday I literally would just do a walk. Wednesday is like my nice day, but I don't actually do any hard physical fitness. I'll just go for a walk or just be outside for an hour or so, take the dog out for a walk. Thursday I'll then do a lighter gym session at Henley for rugby and training in the evening. Friday I'll do nothing. Saturday I have a game and then Sunday I'll do recovery after that game, because I'm normally in pits, which is pretty unpleasant the Sunday afterwards. When you're like wake up in the morning, you just can't move.

:: 03:35

It was weird when you're not playing I don't know if you're the same as this. I actually missed that pain when I've been injured and not playing for a while it's a strange one, isn't it? You've got to miss that pain on a Sunday morning when you get to close to 30, which I'm a lot closer than you are you miss it a lot less.

:: 03:49

Yeah, that's fair enough.

:: 03:51

I think I've got a few things you said. If you don't mind, I think, on the why is it that you don't think you're enjoying the gym that much?

:: 03:58

I go through phases of this, probably mindset in terms of like I'm thinking about other things, like normally, when I'm really good in the gym is when, like everything else in my life is sort of going well and I can go and enjoy it. I feel like at the moment, jim's, because I feels like a bit of a chore in terms of like I'm going Because I know it's good for me and I always feel better afterwards. Yeah, I don't necessarily want to go, because when I'm in there and constantly thinking of work or I'm thinking of other things or Stractions I've got to do later that day, I'm just very busy at the moment. Obviously, this time of year, as we talked about in the previous one, is just like it's tough Mentally and I wouldn't say when the best. Like mental headspace at the moment like nothing awful, but like very, very stressed at the moment with stuff going on.

I think, when it comes to the gym. Sometimes it's a bit of an escape, but at this point in time it feels like more of a chore.

:: 04:53

You feel better once you've been. Is that what you usually are?

:: 04:56

I always feel better once I've been. To be fair, sometimes you're going, you're just really not with it and that's fine, like I think everyone just gets days out. But I'm saying 90% of the 95% of the time. I feel so much better after I walk out of the doors and I'm like I've done every rep of every set. I worked hard. I can take that off for the week and it's just like a good feeling. Yeah, it relaxes me and makes me happy that I've been able to go and do that one in my head. I work up and in my head I was like, nah, I'm not going.

That's not give any excuse not to go, but when you go and actually complete it, it's almost just like a yeah, I'm that guy, I'm still that guy. That's the feeling I get.

:: 05:37

Can I also ask you how you could? Those that were asking on our platform the day and there were those who really were interested in it is how do you break down your, what you're working out on those days? If you're doing two, three, 10 sessions a week, whatever, how do you break down the body parts that you're working out as a man?

:: 05:53

Yeah, so for me I get quite lucky. The sessions I do are planned meticulously by the March on Guys and they are amazing CrossFit programs. So Monday, yeah, like functional fitness CrossFit is just like that's the best thing for me. If I'm, I don't sound a bit like come on, like you just do better than that. But if I'm in the gym on my own I can get a bit lazy sometimes, especially if I'm not pushed and I'll just like lie on the bench for a bit.

When I'm like in a group of people doing these sessions at programs like functional fitness CrossFit, high-paced sessions, you can't, you don't have time to think, you've just got to do. I'm really good when it comes to things like that. So I think for me the Monday split of going CrossFit, so I do the CrossFit Monday, tuesday, so that'll be lower Monday, so it's Monday today. So that's what I did today. So it was back squats, split squats, thrusters, all those types of things, which is great. And then tomorrow is like overhead press day, and then there's also bench press in there as well. So that's like kind of my split CrossFit wise. Then on the Thursday I'll just do like a full body type primer thing, but I don't need more than that at the moment. I think before, when I used to train a couple years ago, I trained like God a lot, five, six times a week. My body just doesn't need that right now.

I've got really good split lowers uppers and then a full body like relaxed day His spot on. For me, what's your split when it comes to it?

:: 07:34

I used to be quite religious on this, so I used to do it depends also on the time of year much, much similar to you. If I'm in a better headspace and I'm not playing rugby, for example, in the summer, and I'm playing intermittent sevens, I can train five, six days a week. I can do a push pull, legs, push pull, for example, and have like a functional sort of more relaxed day on the sixth or seventh, whatever, whereas now I sort of gauge how I'm feeling. So I could do like today, for example, like chest and shoulders, because I felt like doing that's the day I enjoy the most, and then tomorrow I'll do back and I'll do legs regrettably worst day and then I'll go back into that push pull type of thing. So I still stick to that same pattern, but it can be it's day dependent. So, a bit like you, if I'm not feeling a certain thing, I'll just change it upside. So I'm not as religious as I used to be and there are many reasons for that which we'll probably go into later. I'm not religious.

:: 08:27

I think one of the most big difference things I've done is actually like flexibility training.

:: 08:33

Yeah.

:: 08:33

It's just like I'm a very is it a mobile? A mobile, yeah, it's like awfully stiff as a bloke, Like just lower backs, just fuck. But making sure I do my cardio and rugby strength training in the gym and then flexibility stuff as well, that's like the perfect trio for me and like keeping my body healthy 100%.

:: 08:56

I think, coming back to the whole Pilates thing, is the amount of people who, when the Pilates movement first started, it was like 99.9% female dominated, and there are reasons for that Whereas the emergence of young men in getting involved with Pilates since you know, ronaldo came out and started talking about his Pilates routine the amount of footballers that are now getting involved with Pilates because it adds literally years into your career, jokovic. Same thing is mobility and flexibility literally add on years to your career, as well as being able to be mobile when you are 50 plus and you're able to pick up the grandkids Because the worry that I've got is because I took it up so late is because I picked up some of your injuries in my time and I'm 30 next year, so there's no age at all, but I do feel I can feel it. I'm feeling a game five, six days afterwards. So if you can do mobility in between, anyone watching this is ideally get involved with those sort of.

The best about what you're doing is because you're doing that sort of cross 50 type thing. It's transversible into rugby and not those skills you're picking up in, that is, it's directly involved back in therapy pitch. So you're getting fit. You're enjoying it, you're with a good crowd, good bunch. It's over an hour as well, so you can't be distracted by the phone. It's in, out, done, sets you up for the rest of the day mentally and physically. So anyone watching this who's thinking I kind of don't want to get involved with it. I've got the time hour done in our Bosch class. If you're an early bird as well, it's even better.

:: 10:19

Side note to that as well is you said about you can't get distracted on your phone. I think that was another reason, like my workouts would always be ruined. It's like I used to have an Apple watch on and you know like pings through notifications and what's going on when I was Jimmy at like. Like 10 o'clock was like used to be the time my gym, when it was like work, was like a bit quiet or whatnot. Oh, I was just like at uni I'd always do it at around 10.

And it was if I, if I wasn't training for rugby and like I just get ping, ping, ping, ping, ping, message, message, message, and I'd be so distracted the whole time I'd be like miswrap so I miss sets. Actually, just putting your phone away, I know, it's just so like it sounds so easy to do, but I find it so stressful, like physically, like switching my phone I'm very addicted to my phone yeah, like putting it away, my workouts are so much better. You don't understand how much like. If you like go on the train I saw this on the train today If you're on the train and you just like actually put your phone down and take your headphones out and look around, everyone's just like this, like no one, no one's like looking or talking or whatever. It's actually quite scary. I thought that one was on the journey home today when my phone died and I was just sitting there like everyone's very addicted to their phone and putting it away. You don't realize how addicted you are until it is away for an hour.

:: 11:39

Yes, it's madness, I think. If you were to do a study on everyone who, versus the ones who go to those really cool CrossFit spaces and do the class session but you can't be on your phone, versus the ones who are in the gym for sometimes two hours, it's amazing. If you were to sort of look at the amount of time spent on the phone versus the amount of time actually exercising, they're probably on a par, if not more, on the phone than they are actually exercising. So there's definitely a place for group exercise, more so now than ever, because people haven't got the time to be able to waste two hours in a gym.

It's not particularly motivating and people find it hard to motivate themselves, and if everyone was able to motivate themselves really well, there wouldn't be a need for me, what I do. So everyone needs a PT. In my opinion, I'll die by that. Everyone needs a PT. It's whether you can find an alternative to that or if you can afford it, great, but the amount of people that are in the gym that actually are able to do an hour session on their own, a slim to none, is such a small number.

:: 12:37

How do you stay motivated if you're going to the gym? Because that's something that a lot of people struggle with. It's like the motivation to actually get up and go, myself included. What would be your tips for, in a way, staying motivated? It's a really good question.

:: 12:51

It's like I get asked a lot. I think for me even I would admit to anyone asking me this I have days where I frequently, almost every single week, will have at least one day. I'm like I can't bother. And there are days where I walk into the gym and walk out after 10 minutes because there's nothing, we've been there, I'm not in the right headspace, I'd rather go home, and those days are for me where I either punish myself for doing that, whereas now if I could admit to myself that if I'm not in the right headspace, I'm better off going home. In between, that 45 minutes I have left and it's relaxing on winding, watching a podcast, going for a walk, then forcing myself to do a really bad day at the gym. I'll feel worse afterwards by forcing and have a really shit hour.

No, I've got me being there and actually really interesting conversation today with someone and they were saying it's like the same thing. They will give themselves an extra day off. They need to, rather than force themselves to go every single day. So my advice is consistency is key, for sure, but also don't punish yourself if you don't go. Allow yourself time to recover If you want the right headspace.

Don't force yourself to, but equally, remind yourself why you started going is what I would say is, if I'm ever having doubts and I know I can go I'll go. Remember how good you'll feel after you've done it, and I always do, and the same as you like, you always feel a million dollars off that and like with your early starts which are for everyone, by the way, not I wouldn't say to anyone watching this you have to get up at five in the morning to go, because isn't for everyone. People work better in the evenings. It sets you up so much nicer for the rest of the day and equal. If you do go in the evenings, you'll sleep like a dream.

:: 14:22

Yeah, I'm not an early riser, by the way. I just like I literally will roll out of bed, have my clothes right next to the bed, put them on like a zombie downstairs. But I just do it. I've kind of gotten a bit used to it now. I hate the early mornings at the moment, but I know. I hate myself more if I don't do it when.

I have it planned and booked in. I think the days I have skipped them because I've skipped them a couple of times I always sit there for the rest of the day like such pussy and like you know, like mentally beat yourself up.

:: 14:57

I know exactly what it's like. I know exactly what it's like. I think also it's hard this time of year to get motivated because it's pitch black. If you're getting up at six it's not light. For another two hours it's miserable.

:: 15:09

It's so miserable it's raining and freezing this morning I was like why am I doing this?

:: 15:15

The temptation to lie in bed is just so much greater than actually going to do any exercise. Yeah.

:: 15:20

I agree. I know you're big on your targets for stuff as well. Have you ever looked at smart targets? I think that was going to be something I looked at the other day.

:: 15:30

Smart target, as in when you break it down to this sort of anagram for yeah, so like SM, a RT.

:: 15:35

I could be wrong here, but from memory it's like specific, measurable, achievable, realistic time band. Yeah, yes, I'm always at just a bit of a, not a hoax, but just a bit.

:: 15:48

I think, I think inadvertently, I do if I, if I do that, I'll work hard towards something. So like with you, for example, if you know you gotta get better at something in rugby, you can achieve a ball target to be able to get better at, you can target something specifically. So but for me, if I wanted to run a half marathon, I know I got to start running. So, yeah, my advice to anyone would be if you are, if you have got targets, make sure they are smart, achievable, measurable, that kind of thing and and you know, and and give you some time. The time bits really important for me as well. If you've got like a wedding in six months, you've got, you've got something in a diary that you can really aim towards and that really helps people, I think. So the whole you took like last time is the whole new, new year, new me thing, and those targets seem to wane pretty quick when James are packed. January 1st, 2nd and 3rd later, the empty again.

:: 16:38

What's your, what's your view on the whole like new year, new me thing? Because in my opinion, if you're waiting to the new year to start a new goal, you're just never going to do it. That's just my opinion. If you're like I'll do it in the new year, I'll get a great start to the year, it's just I might not do it now and then when it comes to the new year, you already like three weeks ahead and you're in a better place, and you were. That's just my opinion.

:: 17:03

I agree. I agree to a certain extent. I think most people will just go into the gym or not just the gym, any sort of fitness environment without. I can't really think about where to use it's more making sure it's smart before you start doing it. Coming back to what you just said, I think people was going there thinking I need to lose weight and then when they don't lose as much as they want to straight away, they give up. And I think people have this idea that the way they want to lose, for example, or the fitness they want to achieve will just happen overnight.

And the unfortunate thing about is is health and fitness is it takes you months and years to achieve, but weeks to lose. I often use that in. That's obviously quite a loose term, but I think if you want to run a half marathon and you've never run before and you want to run it by six weeks, well that's not really achievable and it's when I walk it. So I think, setting yourself realistic targets but short term ones, you'll get a lot more people that stay in the gym for a long period of time and those are joining a gym. Just seek advice from people, and that's come from someone who's worked in the gym before.

If you go seek advice regularly, make friends with the guys on the gym floor, you'll stay longer, because it becomes an intimidating environment for those that are finding themselves in a bit of a rut and, you know, finding that their their goals are being achieved as quick as they would like to, or the diet they looked on the internet and saw it isn't working, was a reason for that. So I think that, coming back to the smart thing, I think making sure they are achievable, measurable, you know, and he put a time on them. I think those people will tend to last longer than the ones who just go in there with a thinking I need to use a stone by next week to work. So it's not going to happen.

:: 18:34

I love the people you meet in the gym.

I'm like that's actually not my favorite thing is I don't sound like so corny for me to say, but like when I go into the gym it's like when I'm not feeling motivated sometimes, like because we're in groups, like like pt groups of six or whatever it is doing the cross. Obviously, the CrossFit stuff is like you get paired with people who could be like three times your age. So I got paired with this guy wants, who was 65, I'm 21. And I was a bit like oh, and we just like hit it off and it was like one of the best sessions I've had and that's like one of the things about the gym is like you meet these people who just wouldn't talk to a normal life. In my opinion. I wouldn't, for sure I wouldn't go out and when I was in the street and go and talk to the 65 year old guy, but now we're in the gym squatting together, laughing about life and he's sharing stories. It was kind of like wholesome moment, which that's one of my favorite things about that's what I love.

:: 19:27

I think about those small community based gyms, not like the huge industrial ones, I think, which there is a place for that as well, by the way, I think you know shout out to like the ones that I know.

Like new wave CrossFit down the road from me, fraser, the owners is just created like the most unbelievable community in that place and like in state owned by where's another good friend of mine and the. When you go into these gyms, whether it be intermittent, you all the time the people there are just so happy to be there and there are people from all different walks of life and shapes and sizes, agibilities and whatnot, it doesn't matter. Everyone walks in there with the same idea and they leave so happy and it's just these, these little communities they build, that the only generally really care about. It's just, it's so good to see, like, like you say, you, you, you meet people that you would never normally do in work or in in social. No one sitting there on their phones. They have time to be able to ask questions and it's amazing how much I've been common with people that you never thought you would meet and talk to. Hmm.

:: 20:23

I think that's the problem with the big. Obviously there's no problem with the big commercial gyms, but in terms of like that community aspect is like it is so important, like, like you said, with your guy there who Made that amazing community. Do you say new wave CrossFit?

:: 20:37

Yeah, new wave, new wave and in-state, actually next to each other, in the same like park, like next to our neighbors, and they're just like the communities they guys have built is just nuts.

:: 20:45

But some of like my, my best mates, are people like I used to do it like what were people I was with at school. Then we used to gym together at like lunchtime and that's where we kind of like bonded. If you like look back at it, what was the like catalyst of our friendship? It kind of was the gym Could be in there at lunchtime and then we'd be talking or someone would have music on or be like joking around and now like that's where Majority of my best mates are from that and rugby, which is like quite a nice thing when you look back at it and, like you said, you know like meeting people for more aspects of life and more different shapes and sizes, who you just went taught to in day-to-day life, like today in the gym. I got to know this guy called Joe, really cool guy, and he buys like land For a living, buys and sells land, I think, and like read those properties, it's just like quite cool.

I don't know anyone who does that, it's just someone different. He's 26 Lives in bed. For that I was like, yeah, this guy's fucking cool. Like it's just nice to people meet people at where you just wouldn't otherwise because I'm in north London. But that's, that's one which, probably one of my favorite things I look forward to going because of the people now, yeah, I think it does take a bit of time to build those relationships, but now they've been built, I literally I think it's the best thing.

It gets me up and it gets me in the gym the times I don't want to go. I agree, I agree on a smaller scale.

:: 22:00

Now I've got three or four people who even in the gym that I go to, which is really small niche place in Asia, and I've had three, maybe three for people in the last maybe six weeks We've got to be saying like who I've spoken to sort of intermittently and said hello to. They said I saw the podcast, I love what you're doing. It's so nice to see if someone looks like like minded and show this. It's so nice and also you get that even at that level or people have never properly had a conversation with and that's, that's an icebreaker, like I now see them all the time and we have we have chats about it and they give me Topics to talk about on this and stuff with you. We've, you know, dropped in there.

It's just, it's so cool that you get that and it's nice that you get people who Day to day I wouldn't really know much about and now I know loads about them and where they're from and their families and it's just, it's wicked. It's such a nice, safe place which and Jim's do you get a bad rep, you know, and then they do. We spoke about before, like Jim's are an intimidating place and for those that do walk in and stay, they realize actually there was like to worry about in the first place. It's that initial step which I think come on January. A lot of people do and they Either come or go. If they stay, then they they thrive. If they don't, and they can find something that either works for them and maybe regret it, they don't down the line.

:: 23:07

Before we waffle on for too long, as we are normally do, I'm gonna end it on these two myth busting Questions. Miss, but myth busting questions, yes, the first one, oh, it's, is that, yeah. Well, the the fitness myth busters, I'll be our new name. This is one of the questions which I see regularly online which I wanted to talk about, and it was does lifting weights make women bulky? No, so this really annoys me.

The amount of like girls I know who don't lift weights because they don't want to be like big and muscly and like. I'm no PT, I'm no pro in this space, but it's just like doesn't work and obviously, what weightlifting for women usually results in like a leaner, more toned physique rather than a big, heavy, like testosterone filled physique, because women typically have less muscle tissue and they produce lower levels of testosterone, obviously compared to men, which does make it hard to be bulky. I wish people would like know that in a good way is like lifting weights, if you're a woman, will make you look nice and toned and like it's not going to make you look like Arnold, and I think that's such like a common misconception when it comes to the gym. It is.

:: 24:22

And also what I would say to them. I've had this conversation with so many people who have said I would love to join a gym but I don't look like a man. It's like if you think about how much men have to train to look muscly, right, it's that much more achievable for a guy to look bulky than it is for a woman. Therefore, do you realize how much you have to train to go anywhere near that? It's like the disparity of how much a woman has to train to look that way is nuts. You'd have to be the peak of the jetty gene pool. You have to eat X amount of protein just to look anywhere near those guys.

So, like the, weightlifting is good for everyone. Everyone should do it, in my opinion, but women it should be. I mean it is. The barriers are being broken down. The stigma is ending for women in the gym thankfully, because the gym I go to especially. I think it's so nice to see women in the weights room that aren't intimidated to be there, and it's a stigma that maybe in the last five, 10 years has become lessened. It's wicked to see mate, and I think we should be flying that flag and saying that, women, you're not going to like men if you go to the gym. Yeah, no, no, no no, sure.

:: 25:26

The second one I wanted to myth bust was cardio is the best way to lose weight. No, fucking hell Is this. This actually annoys me sometimes is like people think if you go for like a 20 mile run, you're just going to shed all your weight, when it's just like not the case. It's kind of like a obviously cardio is good. I'm not saying cardio is not going to make you lose weight, but a combination of cardio, strength training, a balanced diet, is just way more effective in the long term than just going for a long run and not doing anything. And it could be wrong here. This is just something I've sort of picked up over the years. If you want like abs, like proper stick out abs, you need to do like heavy lifting, like heavy squats and stuff like that, don't you? Yeah, yeah, well, yeah, lifting, yeah, you need to do like heavy weights to brace your core. That's correct, right, yeah?

:: 26:18

So like working your pelvic floor, obviously ab exercises and weight training is like the best combination for that and obviously diet as well. So if you're in a calorie deficit, you are doing resistance training, obviously cardiovascular and obviously set like a balanced diet as well. I think that all those, all those things combined, create like the best version of like a fitness individual for sure, men and women.

:: 26:40

Awesome man, mate, we've gone well over our time, but that was our, that's our bread and butter. We absolutely love, love talking about stuff at air. But normally I say that's our 10 minutes up. I think that was our 25 minutes up of. We got distracted I didn't set that timer. But wherever you are, thank you for, thank you for listening. Also, thanks for the questions and stuff and topics you guys send in. As always, we're trying to cover as many, as many as as many as as many, as many as many as possible.

:: 27:19

So keep them coming in. Basically, any questions, you guys have the first many topics conversation. You want to cover anything they're desperate to hear about? Yeah, far away either of us or on our platform, we can get them covered. Thank you, you're welcome.

:: 27:32

I needed that there. Save me there but anyway, thank you for watching Inside of Mine. That's it from me. I'm going to go, and that was episode four.